I’m sure McGahee would much rather win the real Super Bowl… but with the season we just had, I’m sure Willis will take what he can get.

SCOTTSDALE, Ariz. (AP) — It’s not quite the Super Bowl, but Willis McGahee has to be pretty happy with this championship nonetheless.

The Baltimore Ravens running back took home the trophy at Electronic Arts’ Madden Bowl, the annual video game tournament that pits National Football League players against each other in “Madden NFL” matchups prior the big game.

McGahee bested Buffalo running back Marshawn Lynch — the guy who took his old Bills job, coincidentally — during Thursday’s eight-round tournament. Current pro athletes, Dennis Rodman and other partygoers cheered from the sidelines at the packed Martini Ranch nightclub, which had been outfitted with dozens of flat-screen televisions and Xbox 360 video game consoles to accommodate the event.

Other attendees included Arizona Cardinals quarterback Matt Leinart, San Diego Chargers defensive end Luis Castillo, Carolina Panthers linebacker Jon Beason and Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger.

Earlier in the day, EA Sports announced that simulations using “Madden NFL 08″ predicted that the New England Patriots would be victorious over the New York Giants by a narrow margin of eight points with a final score of 38-30 at the Super Bowl. The video game’s engine simulated the championship bout using the teams’ most-recent rosters and player statistics.

EA Sports says the simulation has correctly predicted Super Bowl winners for the past five years.

Interesting prediction from Madden 08: 38-30 — that has to make sports boooks really nervous.

All it took was quite possibly the greatest back in the NFL to go down, but nonetheless, Baltimore’s own Willis McGahee will be heading to Hawaii for his first Pro Bowl.

“To be going with three other Ravens is also special,” McGahee said in a statement. “It is a goal that I have had for a long time, and I am going to enjoy every second of this.”

McGahee finished 8th in the NFL in rushing yards (1,207 yards, 7 touchdowns) in 15 games with the Ravens.

I’m still catching up from a weekend trip to Chicago (where I was greeted with 2 degree weather and a -18 degree wind chill), so you’ll have to forgive the stream-of-consciousness style of this post. I’m still thawing - much like Tom Coughlin’s cheeks. Seriously, dude. It was -4 degrees last night in Green Bay. It’s a miracle you don’t have frostbite over 70% of your face.

… and speaking of faces, some Patriots fans with recently purchased tickets on the New England Bandwagon love to giggle and point out the “Manning face“. Thanks to the younger, less experienced Manning last night, we now have the Favre face:

“Waaaaah, I can’t start collecting social security for another 4 years.”

Fun with numbers, hyperbole

I caught the intro to the NFC Championship game on Westwood One radio about 10 minutes from my front door. The color guy mentioned that “90% of America wants to see Brett Favre play the Patriots in the Super Bowl.” Well, according to the U.S. Bureau of the Census, the resident population of the United States, projected to 01/21/08 at 18:20 GMT (EST+5) is 303,279,395.

Perhaps there really are 272,951,456 Packer Backers out there… but please: can we stop painting with our hyperbole brushes? Case in point: please stop referring to the Patriots as a “Dynasty”. The Zhou were a Dynasty. The Ming were a dynasty. The Patriots are a football team. When they can win 276 championships in a row like the Ming will they be worthy of such a title.

Welcome to Baltimore, John Harbaugh

Murphy’s Law dictated that I wouldn’t be around any technology for the hiring/announcement of the Ravens coach, so I wasn’t able to catch up on media coverage until late last night. Damn you, Murphy. Damn you.

First, I’d like to say that I’m really excited about what John Harbaugh brings to the team. He sounds like the kind of coach that’s going to really work every ounce of talent out of the active roster and demand 110% on every snap in practice and during games. By all accounts - and I’m sure you’ve read them by now - Harbaugh is a sharp guy and hard-worker. The days of Mike Preston calling training camp ‘Camp Cream Puff’ are over (even though Mike McCarthy and other coaches around the league regularly rest veterans).

Now Harbaugh is scrambling to pick his coaches. While technically not “fired”, all of the coordinators and position coaches were “released,” which essentially means that they can be retained if Harbaugh likes ‘em. Rumors are floating around that if Rex Ryan doesn’t get the head coaching job in Atlanta that Bisciotti will give him a raise to keep him on the staff.

Problem solved.

On the other side of the ball, it’s really Harbaugh’s call. The Sun thinks that he’ll pick Eagles QB coach Pat Shurmur. I’m not sold on Shurmur, but if he helps transition Harbaugh from position coach to head coach with an already established working relationship, I’m all for it. As Billick proved last season, you can always fire friends who happen to be OCs.

What do you think? Who should Harbaugh target for his coordinators?

Art imitates life

I was on YouTube this morning and found a Coming to America clip where Eddie Murphy’s character, Prince Akeem, talks about how the Giants of New York defeated the Packers of Green Bay by kicking an oblong ball through a big H. Strange:

By now you know the drill: Cinder, a chimpanzee at the St. Louis Zoo, is presented full color logos of the two teams in each game. She then choses which team will win, and has been surprisingly accurate to date. In the Wild Card round, she correctly picked 3 of 4 winners. In the Divisional Playoff round, she had a clean sweep, picking the Giants to pull the upset on the road.

Will she repeat her success? Time will tell!

AFC Championship

San Diego @ New England

For the past two weeks, Cinder has picked the Chargers to beat the Titans and the Colts. Sadly (and by sadly, I mean for Jeff @ Chargers Coverage), Cinder picked the Patriots and it wasn’t even close. Cinder was very animated with her choice, which leads me to believe that this game will be put away early.

Cinder’s pick: New England

 Loading …

NFC Championship

New York (Giants) @ Green Bay

I must have caught Cinder after naptime, because she was really cranky. She took an awful long time to make up her mind, but ultimately picked the New York Giants over the Pack. Maybe Blue and White plays better in the animal kingdom, I don’t know. At any rate, though, she’s trying to pull another upset.

Cinder’s pick: New York (Giants)

 Loading …

Nice kudos to Ravens’ Guard Jason Brown, who made his first appearance on Dr. Z’s All-Pro list.  Haloti Ngata even gets some love:

GUARDS (Logan Mankins, Jason Brown) Mankins was my favorite guard last year, and this one, too. He’s got it all, brains, quickness, meanness. I saw him have only one tough game, and that was against Haloti Ngata of the Ravens, but everyone has trouble trying to move that guy. It’s like blocking something out of a quarry.

A sleeper, Brown of the Ravens, ran away with my other position. A different type. He’s a 6-3, 320-pound bowling ball, and when he hits ‘em, they fly. If I needed any convincing at all on him, and I really didn’t, it came against the Patriots, when he just about put a hole in Richard Seymour’s chest.

Of course, Ed Reed made the list as one of the best playmaking safety:

FREE SAFETY (Ed Reed) I had written Sean Taylor’s name in after half a dozen games. He had toned down the wildness and had become technically sound and a terrific ballhawk, to go with his thunderous hitting. The complete package. Then that terrible night in Palmetto Bay and everything went to hell. The Redskins kept his name on their starting depth chart all year. The Pro Bowl selectors voted him a posthumous spot. I’d like to come up with a similar honor, but all I can do is shake my head at the tragedy that arises from nowhere and get on with my job of picking the player I think is best at the position.

And it’s the Ravens’ Ed Reed, a fairly comfortable choice because what he does on the field is the most noticeable. A real sleeper, a player whose game is subtle but effective — especially when he’s covering tremendous territory to find a distant interception — is Oshio Atogwe of the Rams.

Good to see Brown getting props.  I thought he had a very solid 2007 season…

By now you’re all familiar with the concept: I go to the local Zoo and let Cinder, a hairless chimpanzee make football picks based on which logo she favors. If you need a refresher, here’s the original Wild Card weekend picks.

We let you, the reader, try to out-pick Cinder with a series of polls. Let the games begin!

AFC DIVISIONAL PLAYOFFS

Jacksonville @ New England

Cinder took her time, but picked New England. Smart chimp. She ran away from the Jaguars logo, so maybe this game will be a blowout…

 Loading …

San Diego @ Indianapolis

After mulling this one over, Cinder picked San Diego again. The funny thing is that it wasn’t even close — she poo-poo’d the Colts horseshoe logo right away and ran over to the Bolt. Of course, Bob Sanders wasn’t there to stop her…

 Loading …

NFC DIVISIONAL PLAYOFFS

Seattle @ Green Bay

Maybe I should have let the walrus pick this one (with apologies to Mike Holmgren). Cinder paid a fair amount of attention to both logos but seemed to favor Green Bay. Could this be a sign of things to come?

 Loading …

New York (Giants) @ Dallas

Cinder has no idea what kind of stuff goes down when NFC East teams meet. She doesn’t understand the intense rivalry between all the teams in the division or the rich history of bounties (see also: Philadelphia Eagles/Dallas Cowboys turkey day game) when two division clubs clash.

Shockingly, Cinder picked the Giants to pull the upset.

 Loading …

Do you agree? Disagree? Vote and see if you can spank the monkey!

Story via Yahoo! Sports:

Bob Sanders wants to redefine the role of NFL safeties.

He thinks they should cover receivers deep, lock up tight ends and running backs in man-to-man coverage, be versatile enough to play in nickel packages, stuff the run, and, yes, still carry that old, big-hitting label.

A few more seasons like 2007 could turn Sanders into the league’s newest trendsetter.

On Monday, Sanders was rewarded for his do-it-all style by becoming the first Colts’ player to earn the NFL Defensive Player of the Year award.

“I think the league is beginning to recognize that safeties are very important to a good defense,” Sanders said. “I think I’m only the fourth safety to ever win this award, and it’s an awesome feeling to be in Ed Reed’s shoes.”

Reed, the 2004 honoree, was the last safety to win the award, and Sanders and Reed are the only safeties to win it since Seattle’s Kenny Easley in 1984. Miami’s Dick Anderson also won the award in 1973.

If I’m the new Ravens DC, I’m making Dawan Landry and Gerome Sapp watch all 16 of Bob Sanders’ games on a continuous loop before OTAs.

Welcome to the first-ever Ravens Touchdown edition of “Spank the Monkey”, where you, the reader, try to out-pick a chimpanzee in the 2007 NFL playoffs.

How it works
I went to the St. Louis Zoo on December 31st with 8.5″ x 11″ logos of the 2007 NFL Playoff teams. I taped the match-up to the glass to let nature decide who should win in a completely unscientific and hap-hazardly way: by letting Cinder, a female (hairless) chimpanzee pick which logo she liked the best. Why Cinder? Well, because she’s hairless and easy to identify for future trips to the Zoo.

Here is the scoop on Cinder and her freaky-damn-deeky hairless self:

Many of our visitors want to know more about Cinder, our female chimpanzee who has no hair.

When she was born in 1994, Cinder had a full coat of hair. But when she was just five months old, most of her hair fell out — almost overnight! After many tests, our veterinarians diagnosed her with a condition called alopecia universalis. This is an autoimmune problem in which something triggers her body’s defense system to prevent hair growth.

Other than her lack of hair, Cinder is perfectly healthy. Our other chimps don’t seem to care about her baldness, and treat her no differently than they would if she had hair.

The following are my findings, along with a poll. Vote who you think will win this weekend’s Wild Card games and we’ll compare results on Monday.

AFC WILD CARD

Jacksonville @ Pittsburgh

Cinder picked Jacksonville. Perhaps it was the Jaguars logo, perhaps it was the access to the intarwebs or maybe it was her bookie, I don’t know. She did gravitate to the other animal and that may tell us something: she clearly prefers trees to beams.

 Loading …

Tennessee @ San Diego

Cinder was undecided for a while but eventually picked San Diego. I could tell she wasn’t really ready to make the pick so I left the area and came back after about 20 minutes so she could ponder her choice. Once I put the “T” and the Bolt on the glass, she ran over to the Chargers logo and smacked the glass — a ringing endorsement.

 Loading …

NFC WILD CARD

New York (Giants) @ Tampa Bay

Again, this one took a while, but was eventually decided. I’m not sure if Cinder was mad at me for making her pick between the Giants and Bucs, but she very forcefully made her point: Tampa Bay would roll New York. After the pick, she pouted for a while and hid. I know — I’m scared of the Bucs, too.

 Loading …

Washington @ Seattle

Cinder is more of a bird fan than a racist, even if her hairless body is more red than caucasian. Perhaps it was the soothing neon green that drew her in, but she made her pick clear — the Seahawks over the ‘Skins. Interesting to note, though, that the other chimpanzees in the area also liked the Seahawks, further proving that everyone outside of the DC area hates the ‘Skins.

 Loading …

Check back on Monday to see how well you against the Chimp!

Well, Christmas came a few days late for some in Ravens nation — Head Coach Brian Billick was fired today, less than 24 hours removed from the conclusion of the 2007 season. You can imagine my surprise when I returned home from the grocery store with oodles of booze for tonight’s New Year’s Eve festivities and flipped on the NFL Network — I was floored.

Good thing I picked up plenty of champagne. I’ve got a lot of stuff to toast this evening.

Not shocked in the least bit, Billick released a statement shortly after being let go. From WBAL:

“It has been a great ride with the Ravens and the fans here. My family and I have grown to love this area, and this is where we will continue to live.

“I’ve always bragged that this is the best organization, and it is because of the people here. They are the most competent. They made my job easier because of the support they give to make sure the focus is always about finding a way to win. In particular, my relationship with Ozzie Newsome is special. I think the way we worked is the way coaching and personnel should. I’ll miss our scrimmaging about how to make things work for the team.

“The passion, the dedication and the willingness to work by the players is so appreciated. Even in this difficult season, they fought through it. My respect for the players - every single one who has played for the Ravens in the last 9 years - is hard to articulate. They have my complete respect and admiration.

“I believe in the partnership that Steve Bisciotti has assembled. The process does work. I was part of that. He had to make a hard decision, and he did what he believes is best for the Ravens. We are friends and will remain friends.”

And Bisciotti’s statement about the 180 departure from “Brian Billick will return next season” type statements that were made earlier this season:

“I just changed my mind. I can’t explain it to you. It’s the toughest decision I’ve had to make.”

Earlier today, Mike Preston reported that Bisciotti sent some team employees to interview players about Billick. From the Sun story:

According to a report on Fox’s pre-game show, Ravens owner Steve Bisciotti sent some team employees into the locker room to conduct interviews with players about whether coach Brian Billick had lost control of his team.

According to the report, Billick had, in fact, lost the players.

No shock there, but this decision is about money. Bisciotti will bring Billick back for one more season but force him to add an offensive coordinator.

Hopefully, that person won’t be a yes man for Billick, and the Ravens might be onto something. With a new offensive coordinator, there is a long-shot chance they might get left tackle Jonathan Ogden back for another season.

I’m not really shocked that Preston was wrong, but I honestly didn’t see this coming either. I thought that Bisciotti would see that it was a $15M decision and keep Billick around for another season and force him to turn over playcalling duties to an OC. Again, I’m floored (but excited) about the news.

Finally, rumors are running rampant that defensive coordinator Rex Ryan is the last man standing. Apparently, all of the coaches were summoned into a room with Bisciotti and Newsome. Rex Ryan was escorted out and all of the remaining coaches were fired.

The massacre at 1 Winning Drive has sparked a new era of Ravens football.

Media reactions:

• Baltimore Ravens (official site)
• Baltimore Sun
• Washington Post
• WBAL
• ESPN
• Fox Sports
• Sporting News
• MSNBC
• Examiner

Blog reactions:

• Ebony Bird
• Blogimore Ravens
• B’More Birds Nest
• Inside Charm City
• The Big Lead
• The Loss Column
• ExtremeRavens forums
• Die Hard Steel (speculation that Billick is headed to Atlanta)

Your turn:

 Loading …

Edit: The post had so much traffic it brought down the entire Sports Cartel Blog Network server! Lawls…

You’ll have to forgive the brevity of this game preview. Today is my birthday and I’m still recovering a little from last night’s pre-birthday festivities. I’ll be recovering from tonight’s birthday festivities tomorrow and then New Year’s Eve festivities on Tuesday. If anyone knows how to bump your name up on the liver replacement list, I’m all ears.

We kind of suck

Let’s face it: the Ravens are probably going to lose their 10th straight decision today. In case you missed the last 9 games, we kind of suck. It’s so bad that loyal season ticket holders are selling tickets to the terrible towel-toting tools in Black and Gold. And let me tell you — there’s nothing I hate more than seeing those f*cking towels waving in our house.

All pleasantries aside, if the Steelers jump out to an early lead, it’ll turn into a home game for them as Ravens fans head for the turnstiles.

What’s at stake

For one team, a complete sweep of the division. For another, a complete shut-out by division foes.

For one team, the possibility of the #3 seed in the AFC (with a Steelers win and a Chargers loss). For another team, pride.

For me, I just want to see an entertaining game. Today is my birthday and I would like to at least see the Ravens put up a fight. However, something tells me that the team was done by week 10 and are just going through the motions. We’ll see.

Calling off the dogs

The Steelers will be rolling in to town with some notables missing. According to Die Hard Steel, the worthy Steelers blog counterpart on the Sports Cartel Blog Network, QB Ben Roethlisberger will sit and QB Charlie Batch will start, LT Marvel Smith is out with back surgery and T Max Starks will start in Smith’s stead. It’s also looking like SS Troy Polamalu and QB Blower-Upper/Steelers’ team MVP LB James “Silverback” Harrison will be watching form the sidelines, too. Pro Bowl RB Willie Parker will also sit, as I’m sure he can’t put much weight on his foot.

Thank the deity of your choosing that James Harrison won’t be starting on Sunday. In week 9, on Monday Night Football, Harrison destroyed the Steve McNair/Kyle Boller fumble factory like the firebombing of Dresden in WWII. In one of the most dominant defensive performances I’ve ever seen, Harrison recorded 9 tackles, 3 1/2 sacks, 2 forced fumbles and 1 interception.

Roethlisberger is also sitting. In the same salt-in-wound Monday Night Football game, Roethlisberger threw for 5 scores in the first half, spotting the Steelers to a 35-7 halftime lead. Against the Rams in week 16, Roethlisberger had his 3rd career perfect passer rating game (158.3). I like to bag on Big Ben, but it’s looking like I’ll have to eat a hot plate of crow: he’s *gulp* having a monster season and deserves all the accolades.

The Ravens, on the other hand, will be without a lot of notables due to injury. QB Kyle Boller (head), TE Todd Heap (thigh), RB Willis McGahee (chest), S Gerome Sapp (thigh), TE Quinn Sypniewski (head), TE Daniel Wilcox (thigh) and WR Demetrius Williams (ankle) are listed as Out on the team injury report. RB Mike Anderson (thigh), WR Mark Clayton (back) LB Ray Lewis (back) are listed as Questionable. LB Edgar Jones (foot) and T Jonathan Ogden (thigh) as Probable.

Without our top 3 tight ends, it looks like it’s up to Lee Vickers. Did I just type that?

Prediction

We’ll see more of the same as the Ravens stumble, fumble and flail our way to our 10th straight loss. Garbage time continues to be our friend, as we score the only meaningful points of the game late in the 4th quarter.

We’ve now gone 76 games since the last Ravens victory.  Bring on the draft!